Thursday, July 19, 2007

thirty-seven

You know, I thought I knit pretty fast, that is when I have time to knit. But seeing all the people at the KauniKAL finishing their projects in no time flat, I feel rather inadequate. Although, perhaps not reality, it seems as if they cast on in the morning, and by the afternoon of the second day, they have finished the body and half a sleeve. Yes, some people have more time on their hands than I do. I work, I have family obligations, and I am lucky if I have an hour or two of knitting/fiber time a day.

It gives me a mixed feeling to see these knitting divas. Mostly, I am excited and glad to see another person create something beautiful with their hands, some string and two sticks. It's inspiring. It also sometimes, albeit, not very often, it feels as if I have swallowed the scratchy green yarn of jealousy. I wish I could knit that fast, I wish I had that much knitting time, I wish I had that skill, I wish...

I know it's wrong to think this way. I know it's not something us bloggers discuss very often. But I thought I would share this with you in case there is someone out there who has felt the same at some time in their life - someone else who has tasted of the scratchy green yarn of knitters-envy. You are not alone. I think that all who read knitting blogs must feel this way at some time. It's not a spiteful feeling, it's a natural reaction to seeing such beautiful creations.

When I feel this way, when I choke on that scratchy length of puke green yarn, I remember why I made this blog in the first place. This blog was created to help me learn how to take my darker emotions and transform them into something beautiful and productive. Trampled by Geese is from a Kierkegaard quote (roughly translated): Being trampled by geese is a slow way of dieing, but being worn away to death by envy is even slower and more painful.

Whenever I feel that jealous sensation approaching, I take it and transform it into inspiration. Whenever I think, "I wish I could do that," I change it into "What a wonderful creation, how can I aspire to be like that person?" It's not easy at first, but it gets better with practice.

3 comments:

Fun Knits said...

Yes Raven I too read blogs and wonder how people can accomplish so much knitting. I envy people who finish project after project. I have a severe case of startitis. Seldom finish big items. The Kauni is going to be one I will finish as I am doing it publicly. This is why on my blog you don't see much knitting because I am afraid I won't finish it and that is a shame to me. It's funny how we all are so similar but all so different too.
Take heart my kauni is not going to be knit in 2 days either. I started it on Saturday and have about 6" knit. I didn't do anything at the store today that I should have. I didn't inventory, balance anything or even clean the store just knit in between customers and it was a busy day so I didn't get much knitting done. Tonight I came home and worked with my special needs boy, now I am going to go knit for about an hour before I sleep. I wish I had a few weeks off to just knit so I know how you feel.

Fun Knits said...

Well Raven I know how you feel. I too wish I had more time to knit, between the store and my job with my special needs guys I don't get much sitting around time. I sometimes read blogs and see people accomplish so much but we can't compare. I plug away and get some items knit and they are great accomplishments for me. Everything is relative. Take heart it is the process not the swiftness that is the joy of knitting.

Miss Scarlett said...

Oh boy. Do I ever know what you are talking about! I especially feel like a slow knitter when I blog surf and see the FO's of others.

I like to see them, I think of myself as a knitter but really...I might be a yarn collector more than a knitter.

In the meanwhile...I will try to change my thinking as well.

Thanks for telling about the reference in your blog title...I was wondering about it.